ACT can be especially helpful because it:
✔ Reduces shame
✔ Encourages emotional flexibility
✔ Supports self-acceptance
✔ Helps with anxiety and rigid thinking
✔ Does not require “perfect behavior” first
✔ Can be adapted visually and concretely
Many neurodivergent teens struggle when adults focus only on stopping behaviors. ACT focuses on understanding experiences and building skills instead.
Simple ACT Strategies Caregivers Can Use at Home1. Name Feelings Without Trying to Immediately Fix Them
Instead of:
❌ “Calm down.”
❌ “You’re overreacting.”
Try:
✅ “I can see this feels really hard.”
✅ “Your body looks overwhelmed.”
✅ “That feeling makes sense.”
This helps teens feel understood and safe.
2. Teach “Thoughts vs. Facts”
Create two columns together:
Thoughts
“Nobody likes me.”
“Two friends texted me this week.”
Facts
“I always fail.”
“I passed my science test.”
This teaches cognitive flexibility gently.
3. Use a “Passengers on the Bus” Visual
One famous ACT idea is that difficult thoughts are like noisy passengers on a bus.
🚍 Your teen is the driver.
The passengers may yell:
😨 “Don’t try!”
😡 “You’ll embarrass yourself!”
😢 “Stay home!”
But the driver can still choose where to steer the bus.

Simple Message:
“You can bring anxious thoughts with you and still do important things.”

4. Practice “Tiny Brave Steps” ACT focuses on progress, not perfection.
Instead of demanding huge changes:

• Sit in a noisy room for 2 minutes
• Send one text to a friend
• Try one new food
• Ask one question in class

Celebrate effort, not just outcomes.
5. Model Acceptance Yourself
Teens learn from watching adults.
Try saying:

• “I’m nervous, but I can still do this.”
• “I’m frustrated right now, and I need a short break.”
• “Hard feelings are part of being human.”

This teaches emotional flexibility naturally.
A Simple ACT Phrase to Teach Teens “Feelings are visitors. They come and go. I don’t have to let them control my choices.”
Important Reminder for Caregivers ACT is not about ignoring safety concerns, trauma, or serious mental health needs.
It is also not about forcing compliance.
Instead, ACT helps caregivers and teens build:
🌱 Emotional awareness
🌱 Self-compassion
🌱 Resilience
🌱 Flexible thinking
🌱 Meaningful connection

Imagine this.
You walk into a room where the lights are too bright.
There’s a buzzing sound you can’t turn off.
Someone is talking to you, but their voice feels loud—almost painful.
Your clothes itch.
Something smells wrong.
And no matter what you do… you can’t escape it.
Now imagine someone asking you to stay calm, listen, and behave appropriately.
This is what sensory overload can feel like for a child.

“It’s Too Much, But I Don’t Know How to Tell You”
From a child’s perspective, sensory overload isn’t just discomfort—it’s overwhelm in their entire nervous system.
They may not say:

• “The fluorescent lights are overstimulating me.”
• “I’m experiencing auditory overload.”

Instead, it might look like:

• Covering ears
• Yelling or crying
• Running away
• Refusing to participate
• Shutting down completely

What looks like “behavior” is often a child saying:
“I can’t handle this right now.”

What It Feels Like Inside My Body
If a child could explain it, it might sound like this:
“Everything feels loud. Even things that shouldn’t be loud.”
“My body feels tight and buzzy.”
“I can’t think.”
“I want it to stop, but I don’t know how.”
“When people keep talking to me, it makes it worse.”
In overload, the brain shifts into survival mode:

• Fight (yelling, hitting, pushing)
• Flight (running away, escaping)
• Freeze (shutting down, going silent)

This is not a choice.
It’s a nervous system response.

Why “Just Calm Down” Doesn’t Work
When a child is overloaded, their thinking brain goes offline.
That means they can’t:

• Reason logically
• Follow multi-step directions
• Explain what’s wrong
• “Use their coping skills” on demand

So when we say:

• “Use your words”
• “Make a good choice”
• “Calm down”

…it often increases frustration—because they physically can’t access those skills in that moment.

What Actually Helps
From a child’s perspective, support might feel like:
✔ Reducing the input

• Dim the lights
• Lower noise
• Move to a quieter space

✔ Saying less

• Fewer words = less demand on their brain
• Calm, simple phrases work best

Try:

• “You’re safe.”
• “I’m here.”
• “Let’s go somewhere quiet.”

✔ Giving space (but staying nearby)
Some kids need distance to regulate—but not abandonment.
✔ Co-regulation first, problem-solving later
Connection helps the nervous system settle.

What I Wish You Knew
If a child could leave you with one message, it might be this:
“I’m not trying to be difficult.
I’m having a hard time.
When my world feels too big and too loud, I need you to help make it smaller and calmer.”

A Gentle Reframe for Adults
Instead of asking:
“Why are they acting like this?”
Try asking:
“What might be overwhelming them right now?”
That one shift changes everything.

Final Thought
Sensory overload isn’t a behavior problem—it’s a nervous system in distress.
And when we respond with understanding instead of correction,
we don’t just stop the moment…
We build trust, safety, and long-term regulation.

Autism societies in Wisconsin have some exciting updates!  
Instead of affiliate Autism Societies throughout the state, varying by region, there are now two larger regional autism societies --

Autism United of Wisconsin: Supports Milwaukee and their surrounding counties (Waukesha, Racine, Kenosha, Ozaukee, and Washington)
Autism Society of Wisconsin: Supports the remainder of the state (see post below for specific chapters that merged)

Many of the regional chapters still maintain their Facebook presence, featuring local events. If you are an Autism parent or have a child with any cognitive disability, please subscribe!  They provide amazing resources, connect like-minded families to feel supported, and hold many sensory/disability friendly events throughout the year!!

Within the world of disability, wandering is a tremendous concern!  Unfortunately, wandering is a dangerous reality that is constantly on the mind of many families with a loved one with a cognitive disability, such as Autism, Down Syndrome, or Alzheimer's Disease.  

Project Lifesaver is a nationwide program that assists public safety officials with necessary tools and training to quickly locate individuals with a cognitive disorder who may have wandered from the safety of their caregivers.  The Project Lifesaver program is run at the municipal level, typically by county law enforcement agencies.  

Project Lifesaver provides training to officials that includes training on the use of location equipment, and community policing courses that provide a basic understanding of the cognitive conditions that may lead to a lack of safety awareness and how to best engage with those individuals with a cognitive condition.  Project Lifesaver also provides the individual with a disability with a wearable (ankle or wrist) tracking device that law enforcement can use to quickly track the wearer.  The tracking device is typically low cost or no cost to county residents. 

To learn more about Project Lifesaver, visit their website!  Check to see if Project Lifesaver is available in your county!